Confessions of a Fruit Swindler

This amused me for some reason

2010-02-22T10:45:00.001-06:00

Question #62 from the INCT 1100 midterm review:

•"Customer broke a USB key OFF in the USB slot and tried to remove it
with a pair of tweezers when the power was still on and now it is dead."

*bows* Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. For my next trick, I will
stick a fork into a socket. Here I g--*zzzt*

2009-05-11T15:54:00.001-05:00

Subject: Things I am Excited About

The Forest of Hands and Teeth
All the other books that are on their way to my house via Bookswim and/or Amazon
9
Total Drama Action (Duncan & Courtney 4eva, I don't care if she's not in this season!)
This very relaxing day off
Summer vacation with my family
Seeing Jessica again
The not-too-far-off possibility of having more than $500 in my checking account for the first time in like, ever. (refer to old posts to see how school eats my money.)
And of course, my first sms blog post. This was it. Hope you enjoyed it.

That is all.

~Gretchen aka The Coconutter~

Twitter-quest: Google Desktop

2009-03-17T13:48:00.003-05:00

Good afternoon everyone. It's been a couple days, and I think I'm ready to give a brief review of the Twitter gadget for Google Desktop. Here we go.

First and foremost: It works. As far as the simple act of being functional goes, it does that. It's also very cute. Very adorable, light blue and green, with a little heart for the "tweet" button. It's definitely got cutesy appeal.

I suppose it would be best for me to go ahead and list the things this app does NOT do, then go on to say how well it performs the things it DOES do.

1) It does not have a reply function. You have to type the @username in manually. The same applies for direct messages. I believe the text command for direct message works here.
2) It does not have a scroll feature. You can only see as many tweets as can fit in the window once you've stretched it to the desired length.
3) It does not have a shorten url function built in. Nor does it have a "post image with twitpic" function.
4) There's no "follow" button.
5) There's no "favorite" button.

Basically, it shows tweets and lets you update. That's about it. If you click on someone's username, it'll open up their profile in a browser window. It has no special plugins or shorcuts or anything like that. It's just the most basic of gadgets. And really, for a simple sidebar app, that's fine. The lack of scrolling and reply function are a real drawback though.

The app works and updates just fine, as long as you don't have Twitter open in a browser window. For reasons unknown, this causes glitches and update errors. Blank entries roll by when it updates, if it updates at all. The good news is, even when it says "error in connection", you can still post a tweet. Even when you can't see anyone else's tweets, it will always let you post your own. (Random aside: When viewing your tweet from the Twitter main page, it says "from web" as opposed to "from google" or some such. Interesting.)

When it's not being glitchy, the Google app is very clean and unobtrusive. If you're looking for a cute little sidebar application that will let you tweet at random when you're busy doing something else on the computer, this is the one for you. However, if you're looking for more functionality, you won't find it here. Start searching for another application, or just stick with the web page.

My personal opinion? I like having it in my sidebar just because it's cute. I always have a browser window open, so it's not my only means of Tweeting. If it was, I'd be quite frustrated with not being able to scroll. When it gets glitchy, I close Twitter in my browser for a little while. That usually fixes the problem. If not, I log out and back in.

Bottom line: Appeals more to the "casual" tweeter than the "avid" tweeter. Did I mention it's cute? =p

Next up: Twitterfox, which I've kept off for the duration of the Google test. (Only using one app at a time.)

~Gretchen aka The Coconutter~

My Twitter-quest begins

2009-03-14T21:12:00.003-05:00

In the upcoming days/weeks, I will be using and experimenting with various Twitter applications, some for the Desktop and few for the web. As a personal Twitter-quest, I will be trying to find out which one is right for me. While I'm at it, I might as well share my knowledge and opinions with the rest of the Twitterverse.

I'll take each app and use it for a few days or a week or two, however long it takes for me to form a mostly solid opinion of it. Then I'll share my findings on here. Each app gets its own entry, as detailed as I can muster. Hopefully my information will be organized enough to make some sense.

So yeah. Tune in for that.

~Gretchen aka The Coconutter~

What the blip?

2009-03-10T11:35:00.003-05:00

So I checked out blippr last night, after seeing a random news link that it had been bought by Mashable. It had a sort of Twitter-like appeal, so I went ahead and joined. I refrained from blipping everything in sight, so as to not spam my poor Twitter followers with my blips. Blip is a funny word.

Anyway, I already blipped the site itself, so they know my opinion in 160 characters or less. Nonetheless, let me take this opportunity to expand on that opinion.

Good God almighty, I don't think I've ever seen a site as buggy as blippr.

I'm no site development expert, but I've been around the world wide web quite a bit in my time. I know a fucked-up site when I see it. Maybe it's just me, but blippr has some strange quirks. Most are just weird: My homepage kept saying I hadn't made any blips, and showed nothing in the field. But when I click on my profile picture (which for some reason won't properly upload), it shows all the blips. My personal favorite was when, instead of saying I had 0 blips, suddenly I had -2 blips. Blippr, your mathematics are indeed flawed.

At first, I blipped a couple games and didn't put reviews for them. I just hit the space bar so it would think I typed something. Later on, I tried to review these things properly. The box came up and I typed something, then hit submit or whatever. Instead of being like, "You already blipped this thing" or "error: duplicate" or something, the dialogue box just kept re-popping up all empty and ready for me to type in it. It was like a robot stuck on repeat query. "What did you think? What did you think? What did you think?" I had to go back and delete my previous empty blip before it would go back to being sane.

One really annoying glitch was when I connected blippr to my Twitter page. There's a dropdown menu that asks what format you want your blips to be tweeted in. I think there's four options, maybe five. Well, I picked one option, clicked save, and it was all "Ok, your changes have been saved!" Great, except that the box had reverted back to the default option and my tweets were coming in not how I wanted. Good thing it's a format I can live with; no matter what I tried, I'll be damned if it ever worked.

The idea behind the site is cool, and it has potential to be not only addictive but useful. However, until they can fix all the random weirdness, I won't recommend it to very many people. While I'm at it, why is there no "it was ok" option in the blip menu? It goes straight from "like" to "dislike". Some things just don't evoke that strong of a feeling within me. I'd like a neutral option please. =p

~Gretchen aka The Coconutter~

Kindle

2009-02-27T13:21:00.003-06:00

If I were rich, I would get a Kindle and every book I could think of to put on it. If I were given a Kindle, I would go out of my way to use it as much as I could, and probably like it. But I am not rich, nor have I been given a Kindle. So I am not getting one.

For that matter, I don't see much point in spending $10 a book to duplicate the vast number of books I already have. For new books, ok, but to re-read the books I like, I'd still have to carry them with me. I'm not paying twice for books I already own.

Besides, as tech-savvy as I am, I'm also old-school. I like books made out of paper. =p

While I'm at it, do they carry manga on the Kindle? I'm betting they don't.

Like I said, if I was given one, I'd use it. For $360, I damn sure wouldn't leave it sitting in the closet. It does seem really cool, and if I had the money to throw around I would get one. I'm not going to lie: the techie-nerd bookworm within me would love to have it. But I know I don't really need one, aside from not being able to afford one.

That being said, I'm curious how well it actually works. Does anybody own a Kindle and feel like sharing their opinion?

~Gretchen aka The Coconutter~

Moron(s) of the Week Award

2009-02-10T08:38:00.002-06:00

I don't usually give out a Moron of the Week Award, but if I did, the couple in this story would win. I had a hard time thinking of a satisfactory title for this story, it was that strange.

As I've mentioned, I work as a people greeter in Wal-Mart. As such, I see many strange and interesting people come and go. The couple in question were not memorable at first. They were young (somewhere in their 20s) and married I assume, with a baby in a carrier set inside the buggy. (Shopping cart, for those of you not familiar with the vernacular.) They came in with an item to return, and they both had looks on their faces like something smelled. I don't mean that something actually smelled, I mean that they didn't appear friendly or happy. I made small talk and made little jokes while I was scanning their return, but they had nothing to say. Didn't even smile once. Like I said though, nothing remarkable about this. I just assumed they weren't friendly, or they were annoyed with something else. (I hadn't done anything, I was pretty sure it wasn't my fault.)

I'm not sure exactly what time they came in the store; I'm guessing about 7pm or so. A little after 7:30, I was standing in my same spot, and I happened to see them standing by the produce with a basket half-full of groceries. I'm terrible at estimating distance, so I couldn't guess how many feet away from me they were. They were far enough away so that even if I didn't have a noisy vent above me, I couldn't have made out what they were saying. At any rate, I recognized them as a passing thought, like I do most other customers. I wondered to myself if they were able to get their money back on their return.

As I was wondering this, suddenly the guy walked away from the lady and headed for my door. I was already looking at him because he caught my attention when he moved, so it took me a minute to realize that he was actually walking away from her. I couldn't hear what she was saying, if anything, but as the guy passed in front of me he turned around and shouted, "Nope, I'm gone. Peace." and he walked out of the store.

Ok, I have to stop for a minute and comment. What the fuck was that?! Disregarding the simple fact that he was making a scene, and moving on to the more pressing question: Who the hell ends an argument by saying "I'm gone, peace"? He even held up the peace sign as he walked out. Seriously, what the hell dude? Walk out on your wife and baby in the middle of the store and try to sign off like some gangsta wanna-be? I'm serious guys, what the fuck.

*ahem* Anyway, I was very confused. I was not alone in this; two Mexican men had walked in at the same time he walked out, and they were both looking back with puzzled faces. Who knows if they spoke English; at that moment, we made eye contact and all understood each other: "What's up with that idiot?"

I glanced over at the woman, who was still standing in the same spot. For a moment she looked completely dumbfounded. She was either thinking "I can't believe he just walked out on me!" or "Did he seriously just tell me 'I'm gone, peace'?" Either way, she didn't waste any time shaking it off and taking out her cell phone, I can only assume to call his dumb ass.

I just want it known that I wasn't trying to stare. Surely you can understand why I couldn't help wanting to know what was going to happen next.

She stayed where she was, on the phone, for a few minutes. During that time, I'd glance over at her, and then at the door, to see if the guy was coming back. He didn't. Then the lady grabbed the baby in its carrier, abandoned her basket of groceries and walked toward the door, still on the phone. I thought I might as well offer some sort of assistance, so when she passed me I asked if she wanted me to watch her buggy for her. She said no and kept on walking. She went outside and stood by the red posts, still on the phone. She set the baby down beside her and kept talking, watching the parking lot.

An older woman was coming in the store at that moment. I noticed she stopped to admire the baby, and probably tried to tell the woman how cute it was. I couldn't hear a word, but I'm guessing it fell on deaf ears. The other woman came inside and told me, "You might want to keep an eye on those two. It sounds like they're arguing, and I'm guessing her husband is the one who keeps driving in circles around the parking lot." I thanked the woman for her advice.

That I just found hilarious. She didn't say if he was speeding or anything, so this is how I pictured it: "I'm so made at my wife!" *left turn* "God damn it!" *left turn* "I want to show my rage by speeding but I can't go any faster than 15 mph!" *left turn*

I'm being very silly, but visualize it. It's really damn funny.

Shortly thereafter, Ms Dale (another greeter) came to take my 30-minute lunch. I figured nothing would happen, but I let her know that there was a couple arguing outside so that she could report any disturbance if it came about. I was walking toward the back and I crossed one of the managers. I told her, "That basket of groceries in the middle of the aisle belongs to a lady. I don't know if she's coming back for it, but I just wanted to tell you it belonged to her." She thanked me and went on.

I had done all I could do to help without overstepping my bounds, so I clocked out and went to sit on a bench and read. I was in front of the registers, a fair distance away from the door I'd just left. Every now and then I'd glance toward the door to see if they had come back, or I'd scan the registers to see if they were checking out. I didn't see them, so I figured either they weren't coming back or I'd missed them. I finished my lunch and went back to my door.

Is that the end of the story? Not quite. Come on, what kind of storyteller would I be if I didn't have a hilarious punchline at the end? I don't know if you'd call this a punchline, but it is hilarious.

It was about 8:30 when I came back to my door. At 9:00 Ms Dale and Ms Sereta locked the doors on the other side, and Ms Sereta came to meet me at my door. (Ms Dale went home.) Ms Sereta and I talked for a while, chit-chatting about my dogs and my cats and my sick boyfriend. The night was winding down. 10:00 was just around the corner. It was almost quittin' time. All was quiet.

It was 9:50. Ms Sereta and I were ready to leave. I had just picked up the machine to bring it back to the service desk when all of a sudden I saw a blur run past me. I didn't realize it until later, but the blur was the woman. Following her in hot pursuit was her husband. They left their car running right in front of the store, put the hazard lights on, and came flying in like bats out of hell. The baby came too! The man came running inside with the carrier in his hand. Actually it was more of a stilted jog than a run. I imagine it's hard to run with a baby carrier.

When I recognized the man, I turned around saw that the woman had just gotten to the spot where her buggy had been when she abandoned it. Finding it not there, they both ran a marathon to the Customer Service desk. I didn't stay and watch, though I wanted to very badly. I clocked out, told my friend Robert the whole story, bought some cookies and juice, and headed out. As I walked out, I saw them leaving the service desk, much slower than before, with the baby carrier in a buggy now. No groceries, just a baby.

Now that the story is finished, you want to know why these Einsteins get the Moron of the Week Award. First, the man gets points for his inexplicable use of rap-speak in an attempt to end an argument and make a dramatic exit. Secondly, the woman gets points for just leaving her shit in the middle of the store, regardless of whether or not she intended to get it back. Last but not least, they both get points galore for waiting nearly two and a half hours before flying back into the store like it's some life-or-death emergency and expecting to find their shit exactly where they left it. The poor baby doesn't get points. It's not his fault he was born into a family of morons.

I've made the assumption they came running back for their groceries, which is stupid for obvious reasons. After that long with no one to claim it, of course they collected the items and returned them to the shelves. But let's say they weren't looking for the groceries. Let's say they had left something else, like...her purse, for instance. Ok, I can see that being an "Oh God, I need to hurry" situation. As someone who has misplaced her own purse before, I can sympathize. But let's think about this logically for just a moment.

1) You didn't ask anybody to look after your stuff. In fact you turned down help when it was offered. So you don't get the luxury of even hoping it's in the same spot where you left it.
2) It took you two and a half hours to realize your purse was missing? As scatterbrained as I am, I usually notice within a very short time frame. I'm always reaching for something in my purse. They must have been arguing a really long time for her not to notice. That or she's really dumb.
3) You lost your purse in Wal-Mart, sweetie. There are good people in the world, a lot more than you'd think actually. That doesn't change the fact that you were gone two and a half hours. If it got stolen, it's at someone's house. If it got turned in, it's at the Service Desk. Either way, it's not in the same spot it was when you left. So there's no reason to park the car in an illegal spot and leave it running while you come flying in to look for it. Wherever it is now, it's gonna stay there. So chill.

That last set of logic works pretty much for any item you could think of that they might have lost. Credit card? Not gonna be on the floor where you left it. Diaper bag? Somebody turned it in. Cell phone? You had that in your hand, honey.

While I'm at it, who the fuck leaves their car running and unmanned in the front of the store? Forget the fact that you can't park there, and forget the fact that in the area I live in, probably nobody will steal it, but come on. At that point you're just asking somebody to hop in and drive away. Wanna leave all the doors open while you're at it? So yeah, they all get extra points for that. Except the baby. The baby is exempt from points.

And that's my story of the Moron(s) of the Week Award winners. I hope you enjoyed it. I know I couldn't help cracking up all over again as I was re-telling it.

~Gretchen aka The Coconutter~

Phone Blog!

2009-01-31T22:45:00.000-06:00

Hello world, I'm blogging from my phone! This isn't something I plan on doing very often. I don't think my phone was built to handle this sort of thing on a regular basis. But for current lack of a laptop, and the computer being in my parents' bedroom where my mother is currently sleeping, I give to you my first phone blog!

I'm afraid to write anything too lengthy in case I lose the connection, so I'll just do a few short blurbs about things I may elaborate on later.

Bioshock is pretty awesome. I think I've played it almost every night this week. Braid is great too. A pain in the ass sometimes, but a great game.

I'm excited about Coraline. I hope I get a chance to read the book before I go see the movie.

It's already February! What will the groundhog say? In south Louisiana, I don't think what the groundhog says has much bearing on the weather. It does whatever it wants. =p

Jury duty has been moved to Tuesday. My first time, don't know what to expect, quite nervous. Hope it's not too bad.

A tip for Wal-Mart: if you're gonna have something fixed, make sure it works before you give it back to us to use. And do something about that outlet in the wall! That's got to be a fire hazard or something, even if we aren't using it.

Ok, I'm done. Good night everybody!

~Gretchen aka The Coconutter~

To Twilight, or not to Twilight?

2009-01-30T13:59:00.003-06:00

The wonderful thing about BookSwim and/or libraries is that they let you read something you're not sure about without wasting your hard-earned money on something you might not end up liking. For instance, Twilight.

I don't really know anything about the series, except that it's a vampire love story. Obviously it's ridiculously popular, so it must be somewhat good. On the other hand, I just pulled up the Goodreads page for the book, and the numbers aren't doing it justice. For being one of the most popular books on the site, users have given it some terrible reviews. For every five-star rating, there's at least seven one-star ratings and essay-length criticisms.

When Harry Potter came out, I wasn't interested at first, for no particular reason. My mother bought the first one and started reading it. One day she got up to go to the bathroom and I just happened to glance over at the book and see what page she was on. I started reading and was still reading when she came back and told me to give it back. After that I was hooked. I haven't actually finished the series; after Book 5, I was a little aggravated with Harry and his moodiness, so I wasn't as quick to pick up the next book.

Getting back to the point: I have taken a chance on a new popular series before, and it turned out ok. I'm sort of willing to do it again, but with so many bad reviews (from readers, not critics) I can't shake the feeling that I'm going to regret that choice. It's not about wasting my money, it's about wasting my time. Once you read a book or see a movie, you can't un-read or un-see it. It's there in your head forever. =P

If anybody has an opinion to offer, feel free. Otherwise I'll just debate on my own.

~Gretchen aka The Coconutter~

P.S. -- Prior to writing this post, I read a few pages of the Midnight Sun excerpt from the author's website. I hated it, but I shouldn't let that cloud my judgement. It was an incomplete rough draft, and those don't always do a person justice.

New Beginnings

2009-01-26T11:42:00.008-06:00

So I haven't updated this blog in a really long time. Oh well, these things happen. Here we go, fresh start!

I'm still a people greeter at Wal-Mart, and though that may not seem like a big deal, I'm actually very proud of myself. This is the longest I've ever held a job. Not that I was always getting fired from my other jobs, but most of them were just summer jobs. I've officially made six months employment at this Wal-Mart, going on seven. Woohoo!

I'm in technical college now, and so far it's really working out well for me. I feel like I'm finally working toward a degree I could give a damn about. (Computer Network Support, for those who were curious.)

On the internet front: I don't do much posting on DeviantArt these days, but I'm still an avid supporter. Check out the bottom of my page for links to recently posted works. I am thoroughly addicted to Twitter and GoodReads. I won't give out my Twitter name here, mainly because if you're reading this post, you probably found it through my Twitter page anyway. My Goodreads shelves are displayed on the sidebar; you should definitely check them out.

Bookswim is also among my new faves; it's like Netflix for books. Some people might ask, "Why not just go to the library? It's free." True, and I'm definitely a supporter of the library. But the thing is, you might not live next to a library that has a wide selection. Bookswim doesn't have everything (Their manga section is definitely lacking, but I prefer to buy my manga anyway), but they do have many popular titles. If nothing else, it's worth browsing. If you want an invite, let me know and I'll send an email your way. If my understanding is correct, we both receive a discount.

At the moment I have nothing else to say. I may change my mind later, but for now I'm done.

Sincerely,
Gretchen aka The Coconutter

P.S. -- I'm a bad girlfriend. I forgot to mention that I'm still with my boyfriend whose name is Tim aka Possum who I love very much and want to be with forever and ever the end. ^_^;;

Money blues

2008-08-14T10:30:00.002-05:00

In about two weeks, I'll be going back to school. I'm trying to be excited about this, but after I added up all the money it's going to cost me, it's not easy.

The cost of tuition for a full-time student is $1,213.25. I can pay half by the deadline and defer the rest until whatever date they set. But since that date is usually so ridiculously soon afterward, I'll just count the whole thing together. Of course I'll need books for all my classes, and that costs an arm and a few legs. I'm going to have to speak with my advisor to get force-added into a couple of the classes I need, but here's the tentative costs for my books:

Criminal Justice 1107 -- Used $101.50
Forensic Science 2230 -- New $118.50
Computer Science 1011 -- Used $67.50
Digital Art 2050 -- New $34.99

Now, that could have been worse, because the classes I swapped out were $84, $85.50, and $112. I actually expected the book for the Digital Art class to be much more expensive.

Add $10 (I think) for a new parking permit, and you have my school expenses. But wait, I'm not done yet. I'm also trying to schedule a doctor's appointment which won't be covered by insurance. I'm not certain of the actual cost, but the quote the nurse gave me last time was something like $175. That, and I have a loan payment due by the 20th of this month. The minimum is $137. I was hoping to pay a bit more this month, to try and get it paid off faster, but that option has pretty much flown out the window.

And that's about all the expenses I can think of for the next 30 days or so. Now then, let's add up the more-or-less final totals. *gets out a calculator for accuracy*

*drumroll*

$1,857.74

.....Can I just file for bankruptcy now? Seriously? Do I even MAKE that much?? I can answer that right now: No.

I know my parents will pay for any school stuff I can't afford, but I don't like costing them all this money. At any rate, I'm still personally responsible for the loan and the doctor appointment. So that's $312, if all my estimates are correct. AND I still have to set aside money for gas, so that's another $100....I'm gonna stop now.

There goes my money, flying away in the wind. Wait, money, where are you going? Come back! I need you! Nnoooooooooooo...... *sigh*

Until my next penniless post, I remain,

~The Coconutter~

I hear the rain a-comin'...

2008-08-08T12:27:00.002-05:00

...let it wash away the stupid and the dramaaaa....

Yeah, I still haven't delivered that slap yet. It's long overdue. I had sorta hoped to be able to quickly get it done on my lunch break, but the origin of dumb is not in the city, and I had no intention of "making time" for him. I just happened to have a few extra minutes and thought perhaps I could get it overwith. Oh well. I'll figure it out.

Sadly, I have to get back to work for now. I'll post something more read-worthy when I have more time. :p

~The Coconutter~

Diagnosis: Stupid

2008-08-06T08:22:00.004-05:00

Has anyone discovered a cure for stupidity yet? Anyone?....Stupidity?...A cure?...Anybody?.....No? Well shit.

Guess I'll have to deal with this one myself. -_-

Maybe it's possible to slap the stupid out of somebody. Hmm....I'd say it's worth a try.

~The Coconutter~

I believe you have my stapler.

2008-08-04T09:40:00.003-05:00

Well would you look at that, it worked. Speaking of work, I think I'll call it a day after I finish scanning this stack of papers here. Hopefully I don't finish too quickly; I am trying to make money here, you know. :p

I have Zero Wing Rhapsody stuck in my head. I'd post a link to the YouTube video, but it's blocked, so I can't locate it. Therefore, I will now sing. *ahem* "It's you, it's you, it's you it's you, it's you/ How are you, gentlemen? All your base are belong to us/ You are on the way to deeee-structi-on!/ What you say?/ All your base/ What you say?/ All your base, your base are belong to us/ What you saaaaaaaaay?" Ok, that's enough. =P

Working two jobs is a bit taxing, but somehow satisfying. Granted, the job I'm currently at is more or less a "come in when you can" thing, but still, I feel very productive. If you're wondering, I'm working at the local School Board Office, scanning documents and shredding old files. Mundane office tasks, to be sure, but I'm always busy, so it makes the time pass quickly. That, and I have my DS when I have I task I can do sort of one-handed. (What can I say, I'm a talented little sonofagun.)

My other job is at Wal-Mart, where I'm a people greeter. I used to be a cashier at another Wal-Mart, but various circumstances prevented me from keeping that job. It's a long and at some points embarassing story (embarassing as in I feel stupid for letting it happen), so I'll just leave that alone for now. At any rate, I mostly enjoy being a people greeter. It's incredibly boring when I'm by myself, but when I'm with the other greeters, we have fun. One of the greeters is Mr. Truman, and I've started calling him "Rooster" because he always wears his Vietnam Veteran hat. Don't get the reference? It's an Alice in Chains song; look up the lyrics. Just be forewarned: the video is not for the faint of heart...or the weak of stomach.

I did something pretty funny the other day at work. I don't have a userID to log into the scanners, so when people come in with things to return, I just give them a smiley face sticker. The people at the Customer Service Desk don't like having to pull off a dozen smilies, so when the customers come in, I take one smiley and write down the number of things they have to return on the smiley, then I send them on their way. Also, if it's something that's in a box or hard plastic packaging, I can't place the sticker flat on the surface. It makes it harder to pull off, so I stick it sorta halfway on along the side or corner. But anyway.

Also I'm right-handed. Without knowing this detail, my story is not funny. For the record, my handwriting is terrible either way, but for what it's worth, I'm accustomed to writing with my right hand.

Anyway, so a customer came in one night with one thing to return. I reached for a smiley with my right hand, and reached into my back pocket for my pen with my left hand. Somehow when I transfered the sticker and pen to opposite hands, I ended up holding the pen upside-down in my fist. I proceeded to try and write the number "1" on the smiley. Not surprisingly, it was difficult to write with my hand upside-down.

So what was my astoundingly intelligent solution? I switched the pen to my left hand and tried to write like that.

Yes, I am a genius, thank you.

At the time, I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong. I just gave up and sent the guy on his way with a very squiggly "1" on his smiley sticker. After I realized what I had done, I said, "You know what, next time I'll try writing with my FOOT and see if I get better results." =P

Well, I'm about done here. I need to finish filling out my time sheet, and then it's back home to change clothes and leave for Wal-Mart for the 4-11 shift. I get paid by Wal-Mart on the 7th, then I get paid from here on the 11th. Two paychecks, ka-ching. ;)

~The Coconutter~

Test Post

2008-08-04T09:36:00.001-05:00

This is a test to see whether or not I can post from work. If this works, I may or may not have a slightly more interesting post to follow it up with.

The culprit has been found!!

2007-11-05T08:50:00.000-06:00

**Post title is a link to a Kotaku article revealing the culprit.**

*Gasp!!*

Wal-Mart, how could you? Leading us poor rock-starved gamers to believe that Microsoft had sold us short! When all along, it was YOU who robbed us of the wireless technology!! How do you people sleep at night? A plague! A plague on both your houses!!

Seriously though, I have no idea what the real deal is with this. Just be forewarned: If you own a 360 and want the wireless guitar, don't go to Wal-Mart. You won't find it there.

Many thanks to my gaming counterpart, Smokeblue, for sending me this information.

Until my next random pointless report, I remain,

The Coconutter

And so it begins...

2007-11-04T17:42:00.000-06:00

Greetings, good citizens of Blogger-land. I am the one known as The Coconutter. I am wanted in many cities on three separate counts of Grand Theft Coconut. (Props to anybody who catches the obscure reference.) But that's not important right now. What is important is the start of this blog.

By no means is this my first attempt at blogging, nor is this a replacement to my current blog. I will be reporting various happenings and observations of no particular recurring theme. I have some delusion of becoming famous in this manner. How exactly I plan to do this is unknown at the moment. I haven't gotten that far in my planning.

Anyway, here goes my first bit of reporting, if you want to call it that.

Guitar Hero III came out earlier this week, much to the excitement of gamers everywhere. I didn't get it, yet. I figure I'd just as soon wait till Christmas, or even later than that. Not like it's going anywhere. I have plenty of other games to keep me busy until then. At any rate, I was following (not religiously by any means) news and reviews of the most recent installment in the series. What had me (and everyone else I'm sure) looking forward to it was the promise of a wireless guitar bundle on all systems, including the Xbox360. I don't own an Xbox of any kind (though I am now saving up for a 360), but I know there was a lot of bitching when Guitar Hero II came out on the 360 with a corded guitar, so I could well imagine that this bit of news gained joyous reception.

Thursday evening, I was at Wal-Mart with my father and brother. I wandered over to the electronics section to pick up a third new headset for my phone (our puppy had chewed and destroyed both previous ones). After I found the one I wanted, I wasted a bit more time wandering around in electronics. (It is my favorite department, after all.) The Guitar Hero III display caught my eye, and I went over to take a look at the bundle packs they had on the shelf. I looked at the Playstation 3 bundle pack, with wireless guitar. I looked at the Wii bundle pack, with wireless guitar. I looked at the Xbox360 bundle pack, with....

What's this? A corded guitar? Surely there must be some mistake, yes?

Nope.

Sure enough, there was the Xbox360 bundle pack with the same damn corded guitar controller from the GH2 bundle pack. I looked through all the stacks they had on display, just to make sure. Alas, the wireless guitar was not to be found.

After a moment's recollection, I thought perhaps I had misread my Game Informer article. So when we got back home, I pulled out the Dead Space issue (October, Issue 174) and flipped to the GH3 review. Sure enough, there it was, on page 108: a picture of the wireless guitar, with the words "Xbox360 model shown" in bold white print underneath.

I thought to myself, "Perhaps Wal-Mart was merely sold out of the wireless bundle pack." So I went to the Wal-Mart website, to see if it said "out of stock" or something like that. But no, I did not find such information. I did more research after that, but I'll save you some time: There was no wireless guitar bundle for the Xbox360.

I could not help but laugh at the sheer foolishness of it all. I wouldn't know who to blame, Microsoft or Harmonix/Red Octane, but somebody's gotta have their head up their ass. Even the PS2 version had a wireless bundle pack. That's just sad.

I discussed the issue with my gaming counterpart, SmokeBlue, who said that he read somewhere that a wireless guitar will be available some time in December. As for me, the tiny bit of information I found suggested that there were technical difficulties with the 360 version of the wireless guitar. At any rate, there is currently no damn wireless guitar controller available yet for the Xbox360.

Personally, I enjoy the mental image of a thousand and one angry gamers storming the Microsoft headquarters, armed with pitchforks and corded guitars, strangling the higher-ups responsible for this oversight. "Damn you corporate bastards not sharing your wireless technology!! Now die by the very same cords with which you have restrained our rockage!!!" *choke strangle die* "FREEEEEEEE BIIIIIIIRRRD!!!!!!!!!!"

*ahem*

Sorry you had to see that.

Until my next pointless report, I remain,

The Coconutter